I sat down to write this post and forgot that my phone was in my pocket.  And just like that, it fell out and hit the floor, to which I responded, “Damn it!”  Although I don’t want to acknowledge it, that moment changed my mood a bit, so I had to to a few deep breaths and clear my head so I could get back in an excited space to share the post with you all.  That’s growth.  The old me would’ve just chalked it up, thought of something else to do, and told myself I’d get back to this later, when, in reality, the thoughts I initially had would’ve drifted off into space somewhere, never to be captured again.  Progress, I guess. *shrugs*

Here I am on a Monday, which I love when I’m home because the house is quiet when everyone leaves.  I can get my work done, do the Sunday cleaning (on a Monday), and cook for the family.  In my head, those are gifts that I give to my wife and boys that don’t cost me much but build memories for them.  Those are also lessons I can give to my boys about carrying the weight of a household to make sure it stays afloat.  Those are also lessons I share with you because we oftentimes only go after things that are tangible- things that we can show others and celebrate.

But everything about life isn’t celebratory in a way that one has to make a big deal about it, and I say that because only living or working for celebratory moments can leave one on this course of highs and lows that can become exhausting.  Imagine being on your favorite roller coaster and never being able to get off of it.  At some point, the monotony of it will cause you to not enjoy it anymore, but if you’re able to level the field, it makes the ride better and more enjoyable.  How does this apply to education?  I’m glad you asked!

I’ve been talking with a lot of assistant principals lately, and in their collective eyes the highs and lows of the job are sometimes unbearable.  The lows can be really low, especially when your identity is wrapped up in the success created by the person you’ve been assigned to assist, and the highs can also become unbearable at times because the moments that are applause worthy feel awesome, but those applause will fade the next day or the next week.  All that will soon be left are memories of those moments.  Truthfully, the reason those highs aren’t as appreciated is because the applause fade quickly, and they are overtaken by all of these valley moments that consist of problematic behaviors from children, from adults in the building, adults outside of the building, district mandates, principal mandates, family mandates, etc.  It sounds crazy because, well- it is.  And my suggestion to overcoming the rollercoaster headache is always to take control  as much as possible.  That’s the reason I always sit in the front of the rollercoaster.  Sure, it’s scary to encounter the twists and turns first, but it’s a lot worse in the back!

If you’re an assistant principal or a leader in any capacity, I want you to start doing three things this week.  (1) Get up an hour earlier than you normally do and have that time for yourself.  Light a candle (Mahogany Teakwood Intense would be my suggestion, but hey, find one that works for you), read a bit, or do a quick workout to wake yourself up and enjoy the peace before your day comes at you.  Meditate on how you want your day to go, and align your vibrations to a positive light.  We always say that we’re looking for good vibes, not knowing that we may be the ones to bring them!  (2) Map out your day by scheduling every minute of your day.  Sure, it may change, but there should be some constraints around what gets changed because of a need and what gets changed because you allow it to become priority over your initial plans.  (3) Find something or someone to celebrate every day, and write it down.  If it’s a person, leave them a note the next day, and if it’s an event, write it down in your journal so you can remember it at a later time.  You’ll be surprised how these things can impact your own life and ignite the sense of purpose that lives deep down inside you.  I still have notes that my first principal left me in my first year, and even now, I remember the moments or the reasons why he gave them to me.

Those three things may seem trivial, but at the end of the day, the day has to end. Lol.  And it’s important to not live for the applause from others because if you do, then you’ll feel like you’re not worthy when the thing you thought deserved a standing ovation only warrants someone saying, “Hey, good job!”  So, set yourself up for success every day and execute the plan that you have before you.  I promise you that you’ll start to find more joy and more peace in your days.  Nobody is responsible for giving you joy or peace.  It’s something that you have to aim for within yourself first.  And I know it sounds easier on paper, but I also know that it’s worth a try.  I’ve lived it.  And clapping for myself, cheering for myself, and having something to celebrate each day means more than any reward that anyone else can give me.  In a sense, I’ve set the value of who I am prior to anyone else telling me I’m valuable.  So those awards and applause only add to who and what I already say I am, but they don’t define me.  And that’s a good space to be in.  It’s a peaceful and joyous place to be in.

So take care of yourself, family.  Be accountable to your purpose, and be committed to executing the plan.  You’re worth it.

Dr. G.